Me, Myself (Irene... Where Are You???)

Myself: zzzzzz, waa?? zzzzzz

Me: Stay awake, it doesn't look nice...

Myself: He's talking crap, I wanna sleep.. sleep is good. Re-wires your head, makes you more intelligent and improves memory and creativity. How about trying some lucid dreaming right now??

Me: No way!! wake up.. falling asleep when someone is talking is just plain wrong. You're insulting the guy you know. You're not that smart yourself...

Myself: Whatever, dai.. this guy is talking shit. Why is he teaching you to install an OS. You already know this crap.

Me: True, should I tell him that I know all this? Oooh! How about if i show off!?? Tell him that I know all about virtual machines, I used VMWare and stuff? What do you think?

Myself: Whateva, either you do something exciting or am gonna fall asleep and take you with me

Me: Alright, here goes...

Myself: Well........??

Me: Ummm, he looks so happy explaining it. Seems to be having a ball.. who knows, I might actually learn something.

Myself:Ok, he does look passionate about installing the OS, but learn something? WTF?? Do you know how irrational what you are saying is??

Me: Yea, what you say is true indeed. So....? Do I tell him to move on.

Myself: Hmmm, That'll require a jolt of energy and I am too happy now, in this half dreamy state..

Me: But this'll be a waste of my time otherwise

Myself: Next time, I swear... we'll speak our mind out. Next time no hesitation OK? Just leave it this time...

Me: Hmmm, sure.. next time.. surely??

Myself: Yea, surely.. now how many times have we been here before?

Me: Many I guess.. we sure suck...

Myself: We sure do... yep, we suck...

Me: So, next time.. no hesitations. I want your full support. We'll pick a fight with an annoying shopkeeper, talk to a random hot chick and ask her out, show the finger to someone who thinks they are smarter than us but isn't, get on with spirituality and all that other shit....??

Myself: Sure.. next time.....(Whisperingly) you wish.....

Vehicle Checking Point.. read this for your own good

There is this crossroad near my house which is now, according to a friendly neighborhood cop, an official "Vehicle Checking Point" (VCP for short).
As I was driving back from my Linux class 3 days back, a cop at the VCP showed me the hand.. yes the hand.. not the bloody finger... the hand.

[I got to tell you a secret about the hand, but that at the end of the article]

So I stopped by scooter (did I ever mention bike? No, its just a lil scooty teenz..), got off and showed the cop my license, registration and insurance papers. Now this cop was really really sad. I could see the dissapointment in his face, so I thought i'd probe him a little

[The foll convo was actually in Tamil, here is the english translation]

Me: Sir, why did you catch me, do i look like an offender??
Cop In White: No, we just try to catch people who look suspicious.......................
Me: Ok, but why me? among all the other people plying the road??
Cop In White: Most people have their license, but many don't have their insurance, thats why we catch them....
Me: Ok sir, thank you.. but may I know why there are so many cops in this locality? [There were 5 cops at the juncture at that time]
Cop In White: This area has become very dangerous sir. There are lots of stolen bikes and chain snatchings that happen here. These things don't usually happen on the main road
Me: Ah! Yes, as there area lot of people there??
Cop In White: (Incomprehensible)
Me: Ok sir, thank you....

(and I left, so far so good.. but I had my theories)

[TODAY, 3 days after the above incident]

(U can skip this part of u want.. read on 4rm the star mark)

As I was driving back from my Linux class, a cop at the VCP showed me the hand.. yes the hand.. not the bloody finger... the hand.

[I got to tell you a secret about the hand, but that at the end of the article]

So I stopped by scooter (did I ever mention bike? No, its just a lil scooty teenz..), got off and showed the cop my license, registration and insurance papers. Now this cop was really really sad. I could see the dissapointment in his face, so I thought i'd probe him a little

[The foll convo was actually in Tamil, here is the english translation]

*
Me: Sir, why did you catch me, do I look like an offender??
Cop In Khaki: We try to catch people who might not be having their documents
Me: Ok, but why me? among all the other people plying the road??
Cop In Khaki: We are not the enemy young man, don't worry. We only catch those people who look suspicious.....................................
Me: Ok sir, thank you.. but may I know why there are so many cops in this locality? [There were 4 cops at the juncture at that time]
Cop In Khaki: Oh, this juncture is now officially a Vehicle Checking Point. We are supposed to check vehicles for lack of documents (no mention of increasing crime rate O.o)
Me: Thank you sir......

As I left, a collegue of the cop who caught me flagged down a chap on a Karizma who looked like your typical TCS employee... my sympathy went out to the guy who also had all his documents...

Now, here's the real shit... b4 dat.. some gyaan..(Rumour has it that cops regualrly put traffic offenders into a ring (like in the Gladiator movie) and make them have face-offs with their vehicles. You can see the distinct markings on the sand in the picture, which can only be made by vehicles trying to run away from each other. Furthermore the cops also engage in betting on their favourite offenders. Here we see a cop giving a pep talk to his champion. The boy has obviously been caught driving without a license and is now forced into the arena. As you can see, personal safety is a huge issue in these face-offs. All policemen wear helmets)


The real shit

1. Cops want money

2. They can extract money from people

3. If you are wearing a t-shirt and jeans, it means you have money to spend and your parents have even more.

4. If you are wearing a t-shirt and jeans you are irresponsible.

5. If you are young and have a id-card hanging around your neck, you work in an IT company

6. If you work in an IT company, you have cash to spend.

7. If I am a cop, I would love to fleece these two categories of people

Need I say more???

Ah, yes and the hand signal.... If you go in front of a moving MTC bus and and stretch out your hand low, your fingers cupped and facing upwards, it means you are from the MTC and require a lift. Busses usually stop...

P.S. Try at your own risk. If you get beaten up as a consequence, please desist from showing them this blog. Thank you. GM.