Being Human

Is just being human, always a good enough excuse??


I'm dumb

Because I have nothing to write about. I need a topic to write about of course, but there is nothing to write about. Of course there are many things I COULD write about, but I have NOTHING to write about.

So I decide to write about searching for a topic to write about, for isn't that what I am doing right now? But then again, I realize that this still keeps me dumb for thats an age old ploy. Its like trying to choose a number really, like a good old 2, or a 7, a 99 or 49 but then realizing that you don't really want to choose a number and you choose nothing, but since you HAVE to choose something (say your life depended on it) you would probably choose 0. But zero is still a number and your back to square one.And that still makes me dumb.

Or maybe its all about growing old really, for you see, a kid who has just 'discovered' the trick of writing (or speaking, or enacting-whatever it might be) about the indecisiveness on what topic to write about would be elated at his/her unsurmountable achievement. But not me. For I am older.

Its like how old(er? maybe) people tend to not go against the system. They accept its nature and move along in life- living, crying, laughing and dying. The seem so sure about the eventuality of things and have accepted it all. But not the youngsters. The youth are always the backbone of any revolution or radical movement (Gandhiji spent most of his youth 'experimenting' on ways and means to break the system, so yea, whatever) and it takes some time for them to accept the existing system. Oh, but occasionally they succeed of course, and thats what leads to WW III's, Communism, Terrorism, The Red Cross, Astronomy, Physics, Microsoft Windows and what not. But I guess these are just outliers, freak accidents of chaos that help the Romantics extoll the greatness of the human mind and spirit. This, however is never the case, for your average Ram or Lakshmi (and Joe as well) whose's most significant contribution might be the writing of the text for a web page that helped a large number of senior citizens learn how to use the iPod, don't get to experience the greatest that a human being can be. Ah! but maybe you could count the first time they have sex, or see God, or when they hit the pavement at a 100 kilometers per hour as being significant high points in one's life, but those are things I cannot be sure of - yet.

So I guess, it really is ok to write about conventional topics, like love, your exams, your dreams, your family, your culture, your hobbies and the website manual that you might have to write in order to get that bonus, for however mundane they might be, at least they are true and relevant. In fact their very mundaness arises from the fact that they are true and relevant. So, for me, the search for something to write about was never really real, it was just a figment of my stubborn mind trying to be smart, act cool and show off. But in the end, if you've noticed, I did in fact succeed for I have written about searching for a topic to write about (Remember 0??) . The child in me is gloating over my victory (Clever aren't I ??) And this is what it means to grow older. I am old, for I got what I wanted, yet.. you think I didn't (But now you do because I told you for I do still need to show off.... because I'm still a child).

Baldism: The Ultimate Absolute

[NOTE: This entry is absolute crap. Read at your own risk. Hmmmmm, is my blog balding?]

There you have it, my first new religion and I christen it.. no wait, I 'bald' it 'Baldism - The Saving Grace of Humanity'. Baldism is, will, and forever be a truism on our beloved little planet for as long as human beings are alive lets face it.. baldism is what there is. Hmmmm, absolute crap you say? Let your beliefs be questioned more dear reader for I can prove to you the sureness and infallibility of baldism. Lets face it, baldness all around.

The earth is going bald. Yes, mother earth - Gaia herself is balding. With the millions of trees being cut down, don't you think the world is losing most of its Mojo (except of course if you compare her with Sinead O'Connor, which I'm sure you wouldn't, so why do I worry?). With the environment dying, and the earth's resources depleting, it isn't going to be long before we see a completely 'bald' earth.

The economy is balding. Many question whether it had any 'hair' to begin with, but what the hell, lets give Adam Smith some credit shall we. The paper money that you carry, was initially based on the gold standard. You could, in theory, walk into your neighbourhood reserve bank, shove a Rs.100/- note into a bankers face and demand an equivalent amount of gold. But no longer!! Now all you can do is ask for another Rs.100/- note because the previous note 'Promised to pay the bearer a sum of Rs.100/-' . The basis on which the economy was constructed is now... well... bald... No wonder we have a financial crisis on our hands, ever tried to balance a comb on a smooth bald head???

The modern spirit is balding. Where is the love, asked the black eyed peas.. thats what I want to know as well.. Where is it? It's being plucked right from under our very noses (no pun intended) only to be replaced by mind numbing mass entertainment, advertisements, greed, selfishness and of course coffee.

Engineering is balding, but with one tight tuft refusing to disappear.And that little tuft is called IT. Where are all the Mech dudes, EEE shockers and Chemical alchemists running away too? (Bah, I'm not completing this paragraph)

The amount of real baldness is on the rise, the world over, thanks to the UV rays from the sun.

I could quote many more examples for your sadistic pleasure, but I sincerely hope to have made my point clear. Baldsim is THE thought of the future. Scarcity is an absolute and unless we switch to a resource based economy, the future is bald. So as usual we do nothing about it and pass on the buck to the other person... no wonder baldism will never die out. Thus dear reader, let us embrace baldism and let its advocacy of excesses and carelessness sweep us through the depths of time...

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!! I actually wrote this crap. I'm really growing bald :(

A Pervert's Guide To Cinema: The Tulip Connection

When on a lazy Saturday Afternoon

"My Relationship with tulips is inherently Lynchian. I think they are disgusting. Just imagine aren't these some kind of, whaddyacallit, vagina dentata, dental vagina, threatening to swallow you up. I think flowers are something inherently disgusting, what a horrible thing these flowers are! Basically it is an open invitation to all the insects and beasts to come and screw me. I think flowers should be forbidden to children"

Now this is a Tulip.....

O.f'cking o

The Non-Anatomy Of A Blog Entry

There are so so many things that one can possibly blog about. So many topics under the sun, so many ideas floating around, so many thoughts we have in a single day! But almost none of them turn into anything concrete, say like a blog entry. Now why don't they become into blog posts or anything even remotely worthwhile? Probably because they are personal, you think its simply not worth it, you are not able to put your ideas into the right words or maybe simply because the idea is too damn bizarre. How many wonderful ideas do we lose in a single day? How many?????

The Cracker Crackdown

[NOTE: I do not wish to generalise the whole of the nation with this entry, however what I am writing about is the prevalent idea in my immediate environment(s). I am sure there are many parts of the country where crackers are still burst with all the enjoyment and fun that they bring]

Here's a question, what tagline would you give if a travel agent asked you to sell Diwali in a brochure??? Well, I'm sure most of you would have

come up with "The festival of lights".... but is it???

Over the past 5-6 years the amount of crackers being burst has definately experienced a downturn. Reasons..??

1. Child Labour
2. Pollution
3. Its just like 'burning money' (Guess that has been the age old excuse given by all 'Scrooges' out there who were against crackers (and the noise that they generate)

Now reasons 1 and 2 are very very serious issues indeed, there's no doubt about that...but why don't people think about child labour every time they visit the wholesale shop and buy clothes at 'wholesale rates', when they visit the mechanic shops to get their punctured tyres fixed, or even when they want to buy their beautiful carpets or awesome footballs?? I wonder.....

Or the environment when the shopkeeper hands them that plastic bag in which they take home their favourite chips packet, or when they (wantedly) forget to switch off the air-conditioner even when not in a room with they ever popular 'Shit, this is too hot' or 'OMG!! How much hotter can it get'.. yeah where is the concern about the environment, global warming or the melting of the polar ice caps???

I think the Indian psyche easily rejected crackers.. well, simply because its easy... Its easy to deny something that you don't have for most of the year and which is potentially nothing more than a waste of money. Its 'OK' with us to simply reduce diwali into just another festival with the usual sweets, people visiting each other and the poojas, but c'mon how many other festivals are celebrated in almost the same way?? I guess each family placed the burning of keeping up the spirit of diwali to the 'other person' till there was nobody left to carry on the torch.... We seem to
be destroying what might porobably be the most unique and widely celebrated indian festival with our small mindedness and pettyness...

With so much going on in the economy, why doesn't a private enterprise step in and start a cracker manufacturing company that does NOT employ underage workers? Or maybe even the government creating co-operatives that form a few months before the festivals, manufacture the crackers and then disband?? Where there is a will, there's always a way. And about the pollution part, well I hope people switch off the lights and fans before they leave the room, turn of the tap completely and always carry a spare plastic bag around when going shoppping. Maybe that way, over the course of the year they would earn enough 'green credits' that can be spent on the wonderful occasion called 'DIWALI' !!!

Article in The Hindu

Hey folks!!

Just wanted to let you know that an article I wrote got published in a supplement of 'The Hindu'

Here's the link!

This is also my first blog entry!!!

Thanks 'The Hindu' for publishing my article!! \m/