The Honk and The Yawn

A Honk is one of the most common sounds a city-dweller gets to hear. Especially if you live at the junction of many roads, the honks coming in from various directions seem to almost behave like a music instrument with 4.0 surround sounds. Ok, that was an exaggeration, but there was this 1 advertisement where auto drivers create music just by honking, or was that some movie? Blah

Anyway

The honk....

The thing is, honking behaves a lot like yawning, especially at signals when there is a HUGE line of traffic, the light just turns green and the big-ass truck blocking every one's way refuses to budge. A simple lil honk from the last vehicle in line becomes a deluge of honk's from every other vehicle waiting in line!! Its not that the poor truck wants to not move. Whats the point in honking anyway?

Common points between the 2

1. Both are contagious

2. Both arrive out of a sense of desperation (Yawning:Sleep :: Honking:"Get the f*** outta my way)

3. Both are extremely addictive, you do it once and u'll want to do it again n again for that session at least

4. Both are evil and annoying

Anyway

The yawn...

P.S. I found this when I googled 'You'.. muhahahahahahahahahaha!!

The Peasant

Meet the peasant a.k.a the common man....

He looks smart doesn't he? N also kinda cute (in a cartoony sense of course) But you could say he also seems a bit nitwitty. Someone for whom ignorance is bliss, or is it??

The peasant worked hard, very hard indeed. He did as he was told and in time told others what to do as well. He carried out his responsibilities well, took care of those around him, paid his taxes and drank tea.

But somewhere along the way, the common man became intelligent. He realized how to play the game, how to beat his competitors as well as his bosses. He learnt how to make easy money, for people made money of him. He discovered that the world isn't a fair place and that rules were meant to be broken and he too had become smart enough to break them. He had the knowledge and the tools to become the God of his own life.


But the common man faltered. The peasant in him was strong, strong indeed. He also knew that there lay great happiness in the simple. A life with his family, friends and relatives. A life of daily prayer of movies and smiles. One of enjoying the simple things in everyday life like the visits of relatives, of playing with his kids and of eating out in his favourite diner. It would be a good life indeed. One of contentment, peace and joy. One of ignorance and failure, one of relative poverty and ogling at the fancy cars that paced the streets. One of wondering what the all the rich and interesting people did in those huge mansions of theirs. One of being unknowingly exploited and never realizing one's true potential. One of paying his taxes and drinking tea.


But before he can decide who he really is.. its always too late.....

If There Were A God Him/Her/It Ought To Be Called Google

My heart almost skipped a beat when one day my comp did not start. Three years worth of work and loads of other crap was on it. Mine being a Compaq Presario V3149AU and HP having bought Compaq, I diligently gave the laptop to the dealer from whom I had purchased it, after which the dealer diligently returned it to me with the news that my motherboard was screwed and the replacement would cost 18K.

Yes, 18K (18K 18K 18K 18K 18K .... Echo effect)

Stuff you should know

1. Same problem had happened 5 months back when the lappy was under WARRANTY, and after getting it fixed I didn't bother with the technicalities, happy that the lappy was working

2. WARRANTY had expired now.

It was needless to say that my dad was mad, mom even more. I tried blaming some random physics theory, but to no avail of course.


As I was seeing all hopes of getting my lappy fixed, there Lo! and Behold!! I Googled the previous error and like Prometheus being handed the knowledge of fire, google presented before me

http://www.hardwareanalysis.com/content/topic/70497/

A community of fellow people, who had braved to battle the devil before. With their experience, knowledge and wise advise, I uncovered the apochalyptic plans of HP to fleece its customers.
The failure of my lappy was one of a list of problems for which the company provided an extended WARRANTY of TWO years from the date of purchase, but had conveniently chosen to not intimate its customers about it and I was still within the extend warranty period.

http://h10025.www1.hp.com/ewfrf/wc/document?lc=en&cc=in&docname=c01296338&dlc=en

18K Begone Begone Begone Begone .... Echo effect again :P

For Those Who Came In Late (Courtsey.. The Phantom)

GM = GAAND MARA, not 'Good Morning' or 'Gay Man' or some shit like that. For the meaning of GM use google translator.. its unexplainable here.. so..... GM

btw "Harvester Of Sorrow" - Metallica \m/

Death Magnetic in September \m/ \m/ \m/

The Thing About 1 PM

Peak hour traffic has its own intrinsic beauty. Peak hour is defined as that time of the day when the normal traffic rules break down. Its that time when driving on the right side of the road (for short distances of course!!) is permissible by even the cops. Its that time when the idiot talking on his cell phone can easily cross the busiest of streets without carrying out the standard ritual of "Look first to your right, then to your left" thanks to the.. well.. stand still traffic. People are also at their most charitable with advices and warnings such as "Otha, pathu po da poramboku" and "Right indicator pota epome right poga mudiyadu pa, ivalo traffic alle right turn kuda panna mudiyade", only to give you the most warm and sheepish smile when you meet them at the next traffic signal. The unwritten law of live and let live is also highly prevalent where cars give way to little scooters (to avoid getting their cars scratched by those squirmy dolts) and where buses give way to cars (well, simply because they don't have a choice really.. its a bloody bus in peak hour traffic, they can hardly move!). And you find yourself reaching your destination, a bit late maybe, but with very very less risk of getting killed due to the low speeds involved with peak hour travel.

N then there's 1 PM

The same person who might give you valuable advice during peak hour would zip past you at relativistic speeds with no thought about your safety. Driver's rarely honk, or even look in the rear view mirror. 1 PM is a very dangerous time to be driving, thanks to the high speeds involved.

The problem is this->
-1. Most offices have their lunch hours from 1PM -2PM

0. Most wives/husbands and/or mothers (& daddys!?) are too busy to cook food for their spouses and/or kids (pls don't question me about grandparents, great-grandparents, uncles, aunts.........)

1. Most people believe that the roads are empty at 1PM which is never the case

2. Most people believe that 1PM is the time at which they can travel at break-neck speeds, and nobody else would be doing that

3. Most people are too f'ckin hungry to care about traffic rules

4. Most people are too f'ckin busy trying to run away from the SUN (GM Global warming) than pay attention to their own safety



Peak hour traffik \m/

9 Pictures

Picture1: Good ol me merrily walkin down the road with 40+ sun right in my face, lame ass motorcyclists pumping Carbon Monoxide into my lungs, random dogs bumping into me and then acting like it was my fault, headache, dehydration.. good ol me merrily walkin down the road

Picture2: Most gorgeous girl I've ever seen appears in my field of vision

Picture 3: Me, with a surprised face cuz most gorgeous girl I've ever seen smiled at me

Picture 4: My mind's memory mechanism working on overdrive to re-collect some info about most gorgeous girl I've ever seen

Picture 5: Image of most gorgeous girl I've ever seen covers more of my field of vision

Picture 6: My mildly panick attacked face with 'rock show? coffee day? tuition?' floating like bubbles around my head

Picture 7: Image of most gorgeous girl I've ever seen covers even more of my field of vision

Picture 8: Most gorgeous girl I've ever seen SAYING "hello"

Picture 9: Dejected me with 'GM Long hair GM Bluetooth devices GM cell phones GM technology' floating like bubbles around my head

No Force

Shapeless it would twist like a hallucinogenic dream
Light would lash against it, emblazoned
Unlike the creatures of the night, it would stand forth, proud but formless
In spite of the darkness that covered it, it would laugh at its enemies
Never knowing its purpose, form or cast
Like in a maze, it would ooze itself all over, with a logic that defines the logic that so sought to bind it
She was in pain, of course, which wouldn't? For she called out in desperation
But where there was no medium for the plea to travel, for she was alone
All he could do was wait, wait for the nothingness to come and overpower him
Like that little jigsaw that was falling into play, formless, the being was a slave to its own form
For there was no force to guide it, bind it, hold it, comfort it.
For there was light that shone through it,
For all creatures made of light
For all the darkness that surrounded it
It was still a being of light

New Blog

The following is a link to my stories that I've put in a separate blog. Hope you like it!

Chow!!

http://thestorysjustanexcusepart1.blogspot.com/

An Old Woman, The MTC and Me

The MTC as you might know is the Metropolitan Transport Corporation providing transport for 1000's of Chennaites including those among us who are fortunate enough to be able to afford a Rs.120-150 movie ticket(occasionally) but not fortious enough to have a chauffeur driven car.
There is always a sense of bonding among the people traveling in these kings of the city roads, a bond of brotherhood, comradeship and a sense of adjustment that lasts as long as your journey does. But less so for the pretty ladies.. because they are, well .. pretty ladies and so also for those of fair complexion and wearing a t-shirt, maybe its the anti-hindi under current or maybe its just the appearance of a seeming stranger much unlike the working class that populace the bus. It was on one of these days, when an almost 'once-in-a-life-time' opportunity of sitting down opened up before me. But lo! approached a deserving old lady with her little granddaughter, asking for the seat. My legs of course knew they could take the strain of holding on for a few more stops, and after their gracious go-ahead, I gladly asked the lady to take the seat. No, this wasn't your usual "thank you, you saved my life" kinda situation. The old lady simply sat down and stared out the window. But as I turned around to look at my co-passengers, the look of horror across their face was undeniable. I had given up a seat.
I had sinned. Or had I?

Uncyclopedia

WTF isn't this site more popular? This is Pure brilliance!!



http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Main_Page